Childrearing Diary
− CONTENTS −
Early childhood (around age 1)
Early childhood (around age 2)
Early childhood (around age 3)
To prepare guardians for parenting, this section contains key points for raising your child according to each stage of his or her growth.
Infancy (until age 1)
◎Babies communicate by crying
When a baby who is one or two months old cries because of a soiled diaper or any other time when the baby is not hungry, thoroughly hold and cradle your baby. A baby will feel safe and stop crying when held by the mother or father. Do not worry if your baby is only happy when held. Babies begin to cry more at night from about six months of age. If your baby seems hungry, it is okay feed breastmilk or formula even in the middle of the night. You also need to talk to your baby, hold your baby and occasionally play together.
◎Babies love to be held
Your baby will love to be held. When a baby is scared or worried, hold and cradle your baby to instill a feeling of safety.
◎Talk to your baby
At three to four months of age, your baby will smile when cradled, and your baby will make sounds as if trying to talk to you. Look at your baby in the face and talk and play with him or her.
●Being kind and loving
There are large individual variations between how each baby grows and develops. Do not concern yourself too much with how your baby is different from other babies. Each day of raising a child exacts a mental and physical toll. The psychological and physical health of both the mother and the father are important. Rest whenever you can and take care to above all remain healthy.
●For parenting without resorting to physical punishment
Striking or yelling at a child under the pretext of parenting not only fails to help your child grow, but could also exert a negative effect. Raise your child in a healthy manner while keeping the following pointers in mind.
❶Listen to your child's feelings and thoughts.
❷Recognize that each child's growth and development is unique.
❸Create an environment that motivates your child to try new things.
❹Praise your child specifically for what they do well and for their achievements.
❺Find your own ways to relieve stress.
"Parenting Without Physical Punishment" – Toward a society where everyone supports child-rearing.
●Consultations for when you're worried
Health checkups are routine examinations of your baby's health and they are great opportunities to talk about your concerns. Every municipality conducts health checkups for children at 18 months of age and at three years of age. Make sure to arrange for these checkups, and if there is something you don't know or you're worried about something concerning your baby or raising a child, do not hesitate to consult with a physician, public health nurse, midwife or other professional. Children and family centers, local child-rearing consultation organizations, public health centers, and municipal health centers also offer telephone consultations. Take advantage of opportunities such as home visits by public health nurses, midwives, and those with child-rearing experience, as well as interview-based support during the application for childbirth and child-rearing support gifts.
●Raising Children Together
In Japan, even from an international perspective, fathers' time spent on household chores and child-rearing is relatively low. It's important for both fathers and mothers to communicate well and have the mindset of cooperating and raising their children together.
◎Eating
A baby will play by sucking on fingers or putting toys into his or her mouth. This helps the development of the mouth, so give your baby clean toys to play with. At nine to 10 months of age, your baby will begin eating on his or her own.
◎Recognizing people is evidence of growth
Babies begin recognizing people at different times and to different degrees, depending on the child, but evidence for the development of this skill is when your baby begins to differentiate between family members and unfamiliar people. You should also gradually create opportunities for your baby to be with other children of around the same age.
Early childhood (around age 1)
◎A budding sense of self
As your child becomes able to do more things independently, he or she will have a budding desire to do everything alone. Your child may cry, become angry or scream when things don't work out as expected, but when they do, offer praise and encourage to foster motivation.
◎Read picture books together and talk to your child
When a child becomes around 18 months old, he or she will point and tell you about animals and objects. Play together by looking at picture books with your child. To create more time interacting between parents and child, as well as to encourage linguistic development, avoid showing your child TV programs, DVDs, content on smartphones, tablets or other devices and the like for lengthy durations.
◎Set a daily routine and have your child move around a lot
Going to bed and waking up early will give your child the energy to play and the parents more leeway to enjoy raising your child. Have your child move their body a lot by running or walking, and provide opportunities for active fun.
Early childhood (around age 2)
◎Play in safe places
More and more, your child will enjoy running around and moving his or her body. Whenever possible, create opportunities to play outside or with friends, and provide safe places for your child to play freely. Your child will begin to enjoy scribbling with crayons or playing by creating something with some sort of meaning out of wooden blocks or toy bricks. You should try to play together at these times.
◎A more independent spirit
Your child will want to do more things on his or her own, such as eating or changing clothes. There will be many times when your child will cry or get angry because he or she cannot do something well, but gradually encourage your child and he or she will be able to do more things. When your child encounters something scary or a new experience and wants mom or dad, hold your child lovingly and lull him or her.
◎Gradually have your child practice removing diapers
Your child will become able to tell you about "pee" or "poop" in the diaper, and your child will begin to understand you when you encourage him or her to tell you when this happens. When your child tells you about this, offer praise, and do not scold when he or she fails to do so. Eventually, your child will be able to do it. Sleeping at night without a diaper will come later on.
◎Try to prevent cavities
This is a time when cavities can form easily. To create an environment less prone to cavities, it's advisable to set specific times and frequencies for snacks, perform finishing touches on brushing, and apply fluoride treatments. Starting to eat sweet foods can make it easier for the bacteria that cause cavities to adhere to the teeth. Regularly visiting a dental clinic to maintain a healthy oral environment is also important.
Early childhood (around age 3)
◎This is still a time to dote on your child
Both mother and father should hold and hug your child with a smile.
◎Self-assertion begins
Your child will become picky, self-assertive or make selfish demands. Instead of refusing outright, first listen, then respond in a kind manner. This is a time when your child will want to do things on his or her own. Even if your child cannot do these things properly, lend a little help to accomplish the task at hand.
◎Scold properly
When your child is doing something dangerous or against the rules, do not become emotional. Instead, to get your child to stop, carefully explain why it is wrong. When your child understands, offer praise.
◎Enjoy eating together as a family
Enjoy meals together as a family and cherish moments of togetherness. As children reach the age of three and their milk teeth come in completely, their ability to chew develops as well. Gradually get them accustomed to eating crunchy foods by encouraging them to chew slowly. Encourage them to chew well with their mouths closed to promote healthy jaw development and growth.
Early childhood (age 4)
◎Actively seek opportunities to play with friends
When your child becomes four years old or so, he or she will enjoy playing make-believe games with specific roles, such as "house," "heroes" or pretending to drive a car.
◎Have your child help out at home
Having your child play a helpful role at home is a good thing. Gradually add things for your child to help out with, such as preparing food or cooking.
◎Praise your child's good points
Look for your child's good points and praise them. Even when you're busy, try to listen to what your child has to say.
◎Use dental floss
Once the milk teeth have fully emerged, the risk of cavities increases not only on the biting surfaces but also between the teeth. This is especially true for the back teeth, so make sure to use dental floss there as well.
Early childhood (age 5-6)
◎Interact with your child with kindness
Children imitate their parents. If you have a kind demeanor, then that will foster kindness in your child as well.
◎Play with your child
As your child develops manual dexterity, he or she will be able to use scissors and writing utensils well. Try using materials found at home to make something together with your child. Your child will also become able to play ball games.
◎Have your child change his or her own clothes
It may take time, but encourage your child and offer praise when he or she succeeds.
◎Provide roles for your child at home
Create fun ways for your child to perform tasks such as setting the table or putting away the dishes. Also have your child practice being able to put away toys independently after playing.
◎Vocabulary and imagination will develop
Pronunciation will become clear and proper at five years of age. Your child may have trouble with some sounds, such as pronouncing "th" as "f," but when they do, adults should not correct every mistake. Instead, you yourself should speak with proper pronunciation while listening carefully to your child's speed. Get involved in your child's imagination, such as by thinking up ideas together for continuations of stories in picture books.
◎Firmly enforce promises and rules
Your child will develop good friends and often play with them. Social skills are acquired through diverse experiences with friends. Encourage your child to grow by fulfilling promises and following the rules, and by learning to be flexible and not just insist on doing what he or she wants to.
◎Permanent teeth will start to come in
Permanent teeth are for life, so view this as an opportunity for change when you can foster the independence for your child to brush teeth without assistance. Since the back teeth are the most prone to cavities, have your child brush them thoroughly.
* Parenting hints"Family Education to Nurture the Children's Future" at the Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology website
Hints about raising a child are provided in the "Household Education Handbook (Exciting parenting)"